I’m 25 weeks pregnant with my third child and my fiancé has been my rock – even through the crazy moments. I’ve been extremely moody, vulnerable and at times irrational, but he’s been as sweet and supportive as I hoped he’d be. Coincidently, several of his friends back home in Montana have either recently had babies or are currently expecting. I like to joke that there’s something in the water for Montana boys and their wives or girlfriends, but he’s really enjoying sharing this journey with his childhood friends.
We’ve had many conversations about our hopes and fears and although this is a brand new experience for him, he’s shown that he’s wise beyond his years. In my small ‘focus group’ of expectant dads, I’ve gained a lot of insight and perspective about how they feel about pregnancy. Here are the four things they (and your) significant other want you to know:
They’re Scared & Excited
I can’t tell you how many time J has expressed that he’s scared about becoming a dad, but he’s expressed his enthusiasm to meet our son just as much.
The truth is they’re worried about what happens in the delivery room, holding the baby for the first time and changing diapers, but the thing that surprised me most is that most expectant dads are afraid that they won’t be helpful enough or that they’ll somehow burden us because they don’t know what they’re doing.
No one knows how to be a parent until the doctor places the baby in your arms for the first time, and at that point we all start winging it. We have to assure them that we’re a team and figure it out together.
You’re Their Hero
J thanks me for carrying our child and tells me I’m his hero on a daily basis.
It’s nice to know that they recognize, appreciate, and admire that our bodies create and protect life for nine months.
Your Body Is Beautiful/You’ve Never Been Sexier
A lot of us become insecure as our bodies grow and change through pregnancy, but to the men that love us – we are more beautiful than ever!
I’ve heard and read a lot of nonsense about men not being attracted to pregnant women, but in my experience and from the many conversations with expectant dads I’ve talked to – that couldn’t be further from the truth.
They Don’t Care How Long It Takes to Lose The Baby Weight
J and I are getting married next summer, so I’ve talked to him A LOT about being concerned that I won’t lose weight quickly enough. I know he’s sincere about not caring how much I weigh, but it’s still a source of anxiety for me.
Last night, I was going on and on about losing weight and J finally says to me, “I don’t care if you never lose the baby weight. You’ll always be the most beautiful woman in the world to me.”
The consensus among all the other expectant dads I’ve talked to is the same. They don’t care if you’re heavier than when they met you, and they don’t expect you to hit the gym right after you give birth. They’ll be so obsessed with the baby that they won’t notice the few extra pounds.